


Rainbow

by rhi_stone



Category: Poldark (TV 2015), Poldark - All Media Types
Genre: After 2x03, F/M, Flashback to Julia, Pregnancy, Ross's thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-14
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-03-31 11:19:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13973988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhi_stone/pseuds/rhi_stone
Summary: After Demeza has revealed that she is going to have another baby, Ross contemplates if he's ready for this after the loss of their first child.





	Rainbow

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever attempt at writing fan fiction, though I have certainly read my fair share, and I am in no way a writer - so please leave comments and tell me how I did!

Ross had awoken early. He had not slept well, still reeling from the revelations of last night – that Demelza was going to have another child. He looked down at her sleeping silently beside him, his eyes drawn to the visible bump of her stomach. She had hidden this from him for months and yet it was now so obvious, he felt awful about how neglectful he must have been not to notice.

His mind flew back to his previous words, that he didn’t want another child – it was still true but somehow different now he knew that he had no choice in the matter. He still vividly remembered the heartache and pain that he felt at Julia’s death, knowing very well that he would never forget it. It had affected him more than he had let show, and his main reason at not wanting a child was the fact that going through anything like that again would surely kill him.

As he lay there pondering these tormented thoughts, his tired eyes caught sight of a stray beam of light bursting through the heavy curtains. Though it was still December, the cold winter sun was determined to shine. Slowly he rose from the bed and walked towards the window, trying his hardest not to wake his sleeping wife.

His deep brown eyes looked out onto the grassy plains of Nampara, the grass damp from the rain of the previous night. Yet it would be a mild day, with no frost or icy winds – it was not yet a new year, but spring was already on the horizon. Ross was about to leave the window and get ready for the day ahead, knowing very well that he would not be able to go back to sleep, when a flash of colour in the sky caught him by surprise. A rainbow. Julia had always loved rainbows. A lone tear escaped from his eye as he thought about his baby girl again.

He distinctly remembered the first time. How she had looked up at the sky with an amusing puzzled look on her face. “Papa, Pa… Pa” Julia had babbled, pointing her pudgy little hands towards the stripe of colour, trying desperately to escape her father’s strong arms. They had been stood on the lawn outside of the house, Demelza was making their supper and Ross had though it the perfect weather for a short walk. “My dear, that is a rainbow,” Ross had informed the giggling little girl, and now a small smile came to his face remembering how she had prattled the word, “Rabow… Raibow.”

He had concluded, at the time, that in that moment he was truly happy. Ross could barely remember the feeling. Since Julia had died, his skies had been a perpetual grey; though he was thankful to still have Demelza, the child had united them, and nothing had been the same since. Then it occurred to him – maybe this child was a blessing, a chance to rebuild his marriage, a chance to fill the gaping hole that still lay in his heart. He would never forget Julia, but he longed for the feeling of being a father again.

Suddenly a wave of guilt flashed across his mind, his reaction to Demelza’s news had been insensitive. No care. No consideration. It was clear that she had been scared to tell him and yet his reaction had not been in any way comforting. Not only that, he had been so focused on his own feelings that he forgot about his wife’s – he had acted like such a fool. She must be scared too, neither of them was ready for this, yet he had only been thinking about himself.

When he turned back to the bed, his beautiful Demelza was still lying peacefully just as he had left her. Quietly he crept towards her, removing one dainty curl of her auburn hair from his pillow. He picked up the bedcovers and slid inside next to her, breathing in the floral scent and reflecting on just how much he loved this woman. Carefully he placed his hand on her rounded stomach and closed his eyes. Though his wife soon stirred, “Ross?” she questioned, her voice quiet, still half asleep. “What’s wrong?”, she continued. He though of the rainbow in the sky. He had never been a religious man, but the story of Noah’s Ark came to his mind, believing that it had been a sign – of new beginnings, of hope. “Nothing, my love,” he whispered gently, “Everything is going to be okay.” And as if to validate that statement, Ross felt his unborn child kick for the first time.


End file.
